I’m moving

I’m moving

Okay so with my Facebook page in limbo status, with no promise to return, and a webpage that had to be rebuilt from the top up, there have been some changes. I mean, if I have to rebuild, why not go ahead and streamline. Right?

So the new blog is still a wordpress blog, but it’s attached to my website: http://authoranitacox.com/blog/

And my new FB Fan page is HERE. It’s fairly sparse at the moment, but hey, I’m rebuilding. There’s not only dust, there’s an echo, echo, echo…

If life has taught  me anything it’s not always have another alternative, so I’m not deleting this page. It’ll stay right here with this post at the top.

Thank you for your years of support.

With Love,

Anita

#mynameis Anita Cox – Never Trust Facebook

I haven’t been on facebook much the last few months. I suffered a back injury and honestly, I would have done nothing but whine. So I kept my posting/scrolling to a minimum.

But I’m in groups on facebook that are important, groups I’ve PAID to have access to. I’ve taken expensive training courses where updated material is added.

On May 19th, I went to my millionth doctor’s appointment for my back injury. As I waited to see the doc, I pulled up facebook and bam…I was suspended and had to prove my identity.

Screenshot 2017-05-19 12.05.53

I apparently impersonated myself. So fine, I reluctantly sent them my driver’s license. After FIVE hours and several messages, my regular profile was reinstated. The minute it was, they shut down my Anita Cox profile.

Insert tears.

So I’ve paid for courses through Nick Stevenson and Mark Dawson. This has given me access to private groups and content. I can no longer get to those groups. I imagine if I contact them, they’ll help me out, but that’s my time, and theirs, robbed because of Facebook.

Then….there’s my fan page. I am the only admin on my fan page so now, I’ve lost SIX YEARS worth of work. I’ve sent them signed contracts, mail, etc. and still…I’m banned. BANNED!

There’s literally no customer service at Facebook. There are bots that spit out responses…maybe. I’ve received no response from them whatsoever, I’m just still locked out.

We live in a day in age where everyone is on social media. We also live in a world where identities are stolen all the time. Why does Zuckerburg and his underlings need my driver’s license, bank statements, mail, and other identifying information JUST TO BE ON SOCIAL MEDIA? Jesus, it was easier to get a home loan than to prove I am Anita Cox? That I operate as Anita Cox, have for years. They’re costing me time, money, anxiety.

There’s no guarantee I’ll ever see my page again. None. No one to reason with over at FuckupyourlifeBook.

They want this information so they can share it–so they can expose you. Forget the money I’ve spent on ads with Facebook. Forget that my BUSINESS is attached. They can rip away your contact with the world…just because.

And don’t give me the Community Standards bullshit. There are TONS of people online who operate under a pseudonym. Tons. Authors and other professionals use them all the time. Facebook has made it so that you cannot reply to people during events and whatnot from your fanpage. They made this mess and you have to try to navigate the waters that they change at whim…because they can.

And after SEVEN years of being on facebook as Anita Cox they rip it all away in ONE day. My contacts, my livelihood…threatened by them for no apparent reason.

So, I’m going to sit here binge eating Hershey Bars, chasing it with strong coffee while I figure out how to proceed. If that doesn’t work, maybe I’ll stick some xanax in the next chocolate bar and just slip away into the night, never to be heard from again.

We need a different platform. We need one that will be easy for people to switch to because this…this is awful and I’m not the first, nor the last, person this has happened to. One author’s post I just read quit writing entirely. She was doing very well until some dickweed reported her for impersonation. It was all downhill from there.

Asshat of the Day, Cinco de Mayo Edition

EDITED TO ADD THAT THE COMMENTS WERE NOT MADE BY THE AUTHOR OF THE BEST SELLER.

 

asshat

Dear Lord…SWEET BABY JESUS! It takes a special kind of tool to drag me back to a blog where I haven’t had much to say.

First, for those of you not ‘in the know’, authors, cover artists, and yes, even publishing houses use stock art. These photos are not exclusive and can be used more than once. Probably numerous times. There’s a group on goodreads (sorry, I tried to find it again but just gave up) that literally pokes fun at similar covers.

This article sort of touches on that very topic. It’s very likely that if you go looking, you’ll find the exact same photo on more than a few books. You can pay for exclusive photos, but those are salty.

1

Okay, she’s discovered a similar cover. It happens. But Thieves? Really? Because this shit happens all of the time…rookie.

Screenshot 2016-05-06 03.30.41

 

“Seriously, They (sic) just took off his beard and filtered it. FUCK THAT” Uh, no. I’ve seen this pic before. This author put the beard on the guy (poorly, I might add.) But she didn’t bother to correct her croanie. Screenshot 2016-05-06 03.35.15

 

Now here, Ms. Shaw tries to tactfully defend herself. (Bravo for not losing your shit, by the way.) Let me direct you to the last comment by the asshat. “and not even a book no ones heard of but a pretty popular book.” Really princess? Because I’ve never heard of you or your book. It’s great to have self-confidence, but you passed that intersection a long time ago.

By the way, I never heard of you until now and this is the impression you left. You’re rude, arrogant, lack common sense and decency and probably needs to hire a PR firm…that no one else has ever heard of. You know…just in case.

Screenshot 2016-05-06 03.39.14

She continued on her book page…to insult Shaw MORE by comparing her to children. By the way, “Now who looks like a child?” You do.

Seriously. Then, Captain Obvious acknowledges that starting Twitter fights isn’t the best business decision. Excuse me…you posted a link to an author’s book on social-fucking-media and called her a thief. Twitter is open so you can respond. No one butted in, this woman tried to defend the name SHE worked for that YOU were trying to smear, fuckbucket.

This fine specimen continues to tweet to herself. If her book is anything like her tweets, I’m sure she gets a lot of returns.

Screenshot 2016-05-06 03.43.54

Meredith drinks a lot of wine, but perhaps you mean whiny? The last tweet? I. Just. Can’t.

We are a community. We should support one another. I’ve met so many fantastic authors, readers, bloggers…all who support one another.

For 10 years I’ve not called out another author. I have never said one negative word and gave an author’s name. You, my dear, earned screenshots. Congrats!

Ulterior Designs – Cover Reveal

UDcover2EBOOK

Ladies and gentlemen, I did some beta reading for this little gem and let me tell you, it is HOT HOT HOT!!! Here are the details:

Warning: This book is designed for readers 18+ due to language and graphic sexual content.

A blueprint for desire.

With a shared passion for breathing life into an unconventional dream home, the attraction between a struggling new grad of interior design and an award-winning architect with eclectic sexual tastes is irresistible. But with a cloud of lies and loss hanging over him, the only arrangement Logan wants is one of indulgence and pleasure. However, fate seems to have another design plan in mind for them—a plan that ultimately leads them down a path of desire and discovery.

When the man obsessed with creating his unusual home sets his sights on the woman who keeps unknowingly navigating her way back to him, lust clouds his judgment and he makes an inappropriate proposition. After nearly blowing his chances with the talented and alluring beauty, he readjusts his plans, because it just so happens that his sexy ulterior motives go hand-in-hand with her expertise in interior design.

Though Chloe may be young and naïve in Logan’s eyes, she sees him for who and what he is: a man with severe commitment issues. But she’s optimistic—maybe too optimistic. And she isn’t easily deterred or scared away either, not even by the unusual nature of his design plans or his eclectic sexual tastes. In fact, she’s intrigued by them. Faced with a man who can give her not only the experience she needs to propel her career, but everything she’s ever fantasized about, she hopes that their physical and intellectual compatibility can prevail over his fears. And more importantly, that they can move forward to become not only design collaborators, but partners on a deeper level.

Preorder Links:

iTunes

Smashwords

Kobo

Amazon

Writerly Woes

In March of 2015, I had to make a difficult decision and go back to work full-time. This greatly reduced my ability to write, market, blog, etc. I’m still going but at a much slower pace. Case in point, my last blog post was for Valentine’s Day. 😦

I love what I do…writing that is. It is, undeniably, my happy place. And I haven’t given up. I’m working on a story right now. I began a new series with Valkyrie, Tales of the Asgard. At the end of this month you can find me at the North Iowa Book Bash, and I’m already signed up for the Bourbon County event next year.

The publishing landscape is in a tailspin. Small publishers are closing their doors right and left. Authors are claiming that a major erotic romance publisher isn’t paying them their royalties and refuses to give the rights back.

Rosanna Leo just posted about making the hard decision for herself and her family. Rosanna has seen more success and accolades than I have, and I was almost shocked to see her backing away (not quitting, mind you! Thankfully!)

I have talked a few of my closest author friends down from the ledge. It is such a challenge to keep plugging away when sales plummet and expenses don’t. The market is so saturated with every Tom, Dick, and Harriet that think they can write. Some can…a lot can’t.

Amazon isn’t helping with their bologna either!

What can a reader do? Stick with your favorite authors. Always write reviews. Just a few short sentences saying why you liked the book is all that is needed. If you see your author post something on social media about their books, share it. That’s all. Oh, and always get your books from reputable site, and never from a pirating site.

And be patient with us as we navigate these choppy waters.

What would my mother say?

Let me preface this by saying my mother does not have a computer, or a smartphone. She doesn’t do the internet, make payments online, or order anything online. She gives me the cash to do it for her. Yep, she’s old school. Thank God! Because if she did, she’d surely strip my father of his belt and beat my ass with it.

I do have a cousin with a wife that likes to stir things up (not in a bad way,) and Jessica might just show this to her so she can laugh her ass off with all of her wiener dog rescues. But I digress.

What’s incredibly hilarious to me is the assumptions folks make about the authors of erotic content. It’s like we are so sex starved that we are getting finger banged in the grocery store bathroom every Wednesday by the young man who bags our produce.

 

Assumption: Your mother must have been incredibly progressive for you to have the sex education you have.

churchwithfamilyinside

Reality: My mother is a quiet woman, who enjoys country music and church. Yes, she’s read all of my books but we do not speak about them…like at all. It freaks me out that she reads them and I’m sure it freaks her out that I write them. But we don’t DARE speak about them. When it was time to talk about sex, she grabbed a Medical Encyclopedia (for you young folks, it’s the old time version of Wikipedia) and showed me a diagram of a penis. It was horrifying, not to mention not very educational at all. But what it did do was make me stop asking questions. Poor thing…she did the best she could when I asked her what a Blow Job was.

 

Assumption: Your husband must be the most satisfied man on the face of the planet!

Reality: I work full time and write/blog/edit/market when I’m not at work. When’s he supposed to get some booty? Okay, we do have our wild times and yes, he’s a happy man. But he wants sex like 8 times a day. Who has time for that? I got shit to do!

 

Assumption (this one cracks me up): You must slip into something sexy when you write. You can just feel sex appeal slipping off the page. (Yes folks, these are actual words sent to me.)

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Reality: If I have to sit in a chair for five hours, I’m not doing it in lingerie. If I did, the hubs would be attacking me and I wouldn’t be writing. Not to mention I have a 15 year old who would be scarred for life if I sat around the house in lingerie. A pair of crotchless panties would just send him to a lifetime of therapy.

I actually slip into something stretchy and usually have an adult beverage on hand, like Vodka and carbonated cranberry juice, or moscato. During the day, it’s coffee. But no… no lingerie. I did try a dress once but when I sat Indian style, my kid hand a stroke.

 

Assumption: You’ve experienced everything in your books.

giphy

Reality: Do you ask other people what sexual experiences they’ve had? For the record, I’ve never been to an island that is a swingers resort. I’ve never had sex with a shifter, or a pixie. Also, I have never magically grown a dick. That’s all fiction. Not that I’m opposed…

 

Assumption: You must be really open with your kids.

 

Reality: This one is actually very true. I believe in sex education. My daughter can and has asked me some really crazy questions. I’ve always had the answer and shared openly with her. The one time I didn’t, I looked it up. When she came out as bi-sexual, I didn’t shame her. I brought up the research and showed her statistically, she’s pretty fuckin’ average. That gave her the confidence to come out publicly.

The boy…the boy doesn’t ask much. He just mentioned to me that he can’t wear condoms because he’s allergic to latex. So…I gave him an education on non-latex condoms. He’s a lot less comfortable talking with me about this stuff, but he’s starting to open up.

And I don’t just recommend the YouTube Channel Sexplanations on here. I’ve also sent links to my children. My eldest is 19 and the youngest is 15. Who better to explain things to them than a Licensed Clinical Sexologist?

https://www.youtube.com/user/sexplanations

Assumption: You love reading erotica and watching porn.

 

Reality: I do watch porn. I don’t enjoy most of it. The gagging, facials and all around grossness gags me. There are very few “scenes” I find sexy at all. And what the FUCK is with all of the anal? Come on….I actually read an article from a videographer that filmed those scenes. He said the smell alone killed his appetite and sex drive. Don’t get me started on all of the spitting. Who thought THAT was a good idea?

Call me an old fucker if you want, but some of these girls look 14 years old… I just cringe. Not sexy to me. Not sexy at all.

I do enjoy reading erotic romance but for fucks sake there’s so much drivel out there. I find some of the BDSM novels horrifying. According to reviews, there are many out there that like it. But when you draw blood? Well, if I had a dick, it would turtle.

And the bodily fluids…don’t get me started. When I read that a woman has cream oozing out of her, I’m thinking she needs to get to her OBGYN. I’m not exactly getting worked up. Yogurt just doesn’t flow out of a healthy vagina.

chobani-yogurt_0
Oh yeah, this is sexy!

With all of that being said, there are great porns out there and great erotic content. You just have to be a smart buyer. Look at/read the samples. I’m not saying mine is the best. Not at all or I’d be selling like Maya Banks and Shayla Black.

 

Assumption: You’ve got to be making a killing!

 

Reality: I work a full-time job because I have to. Because I have a family. Maybe one day, I’ll be able to get the big house. For now, no, a killing doesn’t describe what I’m making.

Baoule Spirit Lovers Guest Post by Christy Gissendaner

statue

The Baoule people of Africa’s Ivory Coast believe a parallel universe, called the Blolo, exists where the spirits of newborns waiting to be born and the deceased co-exist with the real world. Every spirit has a mate in the Blolo, who can be enlisted to save their mate’s problems while in our world. Interesting? I certainly thought so. Enough to write a Christmas novella centered on the Baoule culture.

Romantic problems, infertility, and general unhappiness in the real world can be cured by commissioning figurines of spirit mates. Blolo bian (males) and Blolo bla (females) are generally carved from wood and are created to the specifications found most desirable in a spirit mate. Food, money, and attention can be given to the spirit mate to keep them appeased, thus allowing a person to find happiness in the real world.

Active relationships are maintained between spirit mates, particularly in a dream state. It is believed that nocturnal visits from a spirit mate will initiate healthy interaction between a person and his or her physical mate.

Much detail is given to these figurines – plump bottoms, elegant necks, thick legs. All the attributes desirable in a proper Baoule mate. Social status and individuality is acquired by use of adornment, costume, and hairstyle. Even skin tone is considered when commissioning a spirit mate statue.

This very primitive…yet romantic…practice provided the inspiration for Christmas Spirits, a holiday themed novella set in modern-day Georgia. A chance reading in an old encyclopedia and Tedros, the “spirit” of Christmas Spirits, was born! The story is meant to portray the reality of spirit lovers, and I took a very atypical approach to most romance novels.

Keep reading to learn more about Kia’s quest for happiness and just what role Tedros plays in her search for happiness.

Christy cover

Coming Soon

Christy Gissendaner

Genre: Paranormal, Contemporary, African American, holiday romance

Publisher: Christy Gissendaner

Number of pages: 90

Word Count: 20,000

Book Description:

Kia Mays has little time for anything as her lifelong dream of being a fashion designer comes to fruition. For Christmas, she takes time out of her busy schedule to visit her family in Georgia where her beloved grandmother, Naya, reveals a secret of her Baoule heritage.

In Baoule, located on the Ivory Coast of Africa, the people believe in spirit lovers, which you are separated from at birth. Tedros, Kia’s lover from the spirit world, appears to her and reveals that he is there to assist her in finding a mortal lover.

Elliot Melton, the brother of Kia’s new sister in law, is also invited to share the season with the family. With the help of a meddling grandmother and an otherworldly spirit, Elliot and Kia soon find out that Christmas is the best time to fall in love.

Buy Links:

http://www.amazon.com/Christmas-Spirits-Christy-Gissendaner-ebook/dp/B016G14KS4/

http://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/%22Christy%20Gissendaner%22?Ntk=P_key_Contributor_List&Ns=P_Sales_Rank&Ntx=mode+matchall

Excerpt

One moment Tedros was there, and the next, his image faded away. She blinked and opened her eyes to find herself in a store, only a few feet from Elliot. He stood in the middle of the women’s clothing, frozen like a statue.

She circled him to admire his form.  His taut buttocks and thick thighs looked delectable in a pair of dark jeans.  A faded Hendrix T-shirt completed his ensemble.  His casual clothes should make him look ordinary, but even in a sackcloth the man would entice a sane woman to madness.

She could stand there forever, but her body urged her to do more than look.  She touched him, and he immediately came to life.  He didn’t seem to notice the sales lady frozen at his side or the young couple stuck in an eternal embrace.

She drew him toward the dressing room, allowing him to see the promise evident in her eyes.

“Kia,” he said her name, but she shushed him with one hand over his mouth.

“Don’t ask any questions.”  She ran her other hand across his firm pectorals before she reached for the hem and drew it upward.  “I want you to think about what we’re fixing to do.”

“And what is that?”  His lips tickled her palm as he ignored her command and spoke anyway.

She gave him a coy look.  “What do you think?”

He snuck his hands around her waist and cupped her ass.  “I think you’re being very naughty this Christmas.”

“Maybe I need a spanking.” She took a step back, intrigued by her reflection in the mirror.  Her thigh length skirt and tall, heeled boots were unintentionally sexy when paired with a pink cashmere sweater.  She lifted a leg to unzip her boot, but Elliot stopped her.

“No.  Leave them on.”

She slowly lowered her foot to the floor.  This could be interesting.

Without waiting for him to give another command, she reached under her skirt and peeled off her panties.  The red silk slithered down her thighs and she balanced on one foot, then the other, as she tossed them aside.

Elliot’s jaw tightened as raw need flashed across his feet.

“Come here.”  His husky voice promised untold delights.

She shook her head and crooked a finger at him before sinking into the padded chair opposite the mirror.  “You come here.”

She spread her legs.  The damp curls of her sex were clearly visible in the mirror.  Her hand dropped to her lap and she flipped her skirt aside.  “It’s time I gave you your present.”

He zeroed in between her thighs.  His nostrils flared and his dark gaze met hers hungrily.  “Baby girl, you’d better be damned sure.”

The familiar nickname on his lips warmed her heart. Other places, too. “Merry Christmas, Elliot.”

He moved forward.  He bent his head to capture her lips, and his kiss left no doubt she would be his before they left the dressing room.  She held onto his shoulders and lost herself in the forceful kiss.  She rubbed against him, and her delicate tissue scraped the fly of his jeans.  The rough material and cold metal made her shiver. 

About the Author:

Christy Gissendaner is a paranormal and contemporary romance authorauthor who believes laughter and love should go hand in hand.

 

Christy lives in Alabama with her husband and three sons. She’s always hard at work on her next novel, but in her spare time she loves blackjack, karaoke, and anything resembling a vacation!

 

To find out more, please visit http://christygissendaner.webs.com

 

http://www.twitter.com/christygis

 

http://www.facebook.com/christygis

 

http://www.goodreads.com/christygissendaner